This comedic monologue features a young man trying to apologize to his girlfriend and runs 1-2 minutes.
Henry attempts to apologize to his girlfriend for canceling plans.
Hey, sorry about last night. I just didn't feel like going out.
(Pause where she says nothing.)
Okay, so the guys were over. The game went a little long is all. I apologize, okay? I should have called you earlier to tell you I wouldn't be there. Are we cool?
(She nods curtly.)
Okay, I see you nodding, but now I feel like maybe we're not cool and that actually you're mad at me.
So are you mad at me? Blink once for yes, twice for no. Okay, fine, I'm not funny. I get it. It's not like I knew you were going to go early and get us a table. How could I have known that? It sounds like you're the one who's embarrassed that people were waiting on you and that you had to leave without ordering, but what does that have to do with me? We agreed that we might meet at eight.
Okay, I'm not saying that what you did wasn't nice. Normally that would be really thoughtful. But that doesn't mean I knew you were doing it. If I had I would have called sooner. I'm not an inconsiderate jerk, you know. I'm just trying to point out where you might be being a bit…hypocritical.
(The look she gives him makes him reconsider.)
Okay, never mind, never mind, I take it back! Jeez! Can't you see that I'm trying to apologize?