Instant Monologues
Existentialism Instant Monologue



Chris is walking out of Hamlet with his friend Rob and has become increasing upset by the nature of the play.


'To be or not to be?' is not even remotely the question. I'm sorry, I know you're supposed to like Shakespeare and all, but I think it's a crock. If theater is all about self-absorbed teenagers trying to decide whether or not being a prince is good enough to stay alive, then we have failed our children. Let me solve this dilemma for you, Hamlet, you little punk: To be. There. That is the answer.

Can you imagine if we all did that, all the time? I wake up every morning and wonder if coffee is going to be enough to get me out the door to a job I can't stand. My internal conflicts mostly cover "Should I take out a second mortgage or keep the junker car I already have?" and "If my stupid kids keep whining to me about getting a bigger TV, would it be immoral to sell them into slavery?"

Sometimes it gets to the point where I think I'm just living this life because it's already in place. What do I care about TV screen sizes? I used to have dreams. I was going to be an astronaut. Now all I want is a little peace. Maybe a good night's sleep. That's the real question, isn't it: to keep slogging forward to an unknown destination or to just stay where you are and try to sleep it all away?

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