Running 1-2 minutes as an audition piece, this comedic monologue is from a young man at a college party.
INT: A VERY LOUD HOUSE PARTY ON A COLLEGE CAMPUS.
Matt, holding a Solo cup, approaches a girl he doesn't know.
(Trying to be heard over the music)
Hey! You look like you could use a drink.
(She holds up her hand, which had been at her side, revealing a cup.)
Oh, cool! You've got one. That's good. I'll just drink this one. I've already had like eight but I'm not even really drunk yet. Just buzzed. Like, a little tipsy, maybe. I don't know if you were over at the beer pong table earlier, but we were really killing it. I mean, I didn't see you, but I was focusing pretty hard, y'know? I probably would've remembered if I'd seen you over there, but I was like, really in the zone.
(Girl makes an indistinct noise. He bobs his head awkwardly for a moment.)
I like your, um, pin there. "Geology Rocks!" I get it. I like that, that's good. So are you majoring in geology, then?
(Indistinct noise. Pause.)
I'm double majoring in business and philosophy. I think it's important to have your ethics when you're on Wall Street. It's so easy for people to lose themselves, you know? Like, their moral compass, just for the almighty American dollar.
So…do you want to maybe-okay, you're leaving. Later then, I guess.
(Watches her walk away. Quietly, to himself)
Wow, cool. That was really rude. Self-centered, much? Whatever. No big deal. I'm doing just fine. Just…just fine.